We have a partial birthday cake!

Tomorrow is Gaby's 3rd birthday party, so today we went to Mum & Dad's (as is usual for a Friday), and I baked her cake, and cut out the 'pattern' - so all I need to do tomorrow morning is get the thing iced!  I chose a Mickey Mouse cake - I was planning on using a template from the net, but then I found that the birthday cake book Mum used for our cakes when WE were kids, has a Mickey Mouse cake in it, that made it a LOT easier.  Basically I had to bake two circular cakes, from one I cut two circles, for the ears (my Dad liked the fact that there was a lot of 'cake cut off' left over, for him to eat!), and the other cake is the face - all I needed to do to 'shape' that, was to cut two triangular shapes about half way down the cake - and I guess this marks the seperation between Mickey's ears and the rest of his face.

Gaby is very excited because her little friend - Josh, is going to be there!  We haven't seen him, or his Mum (Serena) since the end of March, so there is going to be a lot of difference between them now (compared to back then!).  Josh is 3 months older than Gaby, and they always have so much fun together, so I am really glad they are able to come!  Other than Rena & Joshy, it's just going to be Nan & Poppa (my parents), Jason & Me, who are there, but I think that's more than enough for Gaby to handle.  I would have LIKED to have lots of family there, but then it becomes a bit more than a 'relaxed gathering', and would probably involve a lot of planning - and a lot more money!

I really can't believe my little girl is going to be three soon.  Seems crazy to think that this time 3 years ago, I was getting excited about going in for my induction the following day.  Of course the induction didn't work & I ended up getting a caesarean - 2 days after I went in for the induction!  I look at her baby photos, and then her photos now, and it is bizarre to think it's the same child...

As far as I know, things are going well in baby-land.  I still have my morning sickness & tiredness - and my breasts are REALLY sore today... and it seems that the need to frequently urinate has kicked in too, I think I went about 5 times while we were at the mall today (which around 2 hours!).  If Mum didn't know before now, I'm sure she would have figured it out today!  Our first ultrasound is on Wednesday, I'll be 6w0d, and I'm HOPING that we see SOMETHING...  even if there isn't a heartbeat, hopefully there will be the gestational sac and fetal pole, measuring right on for my dates.  That said, I hope hope hope there is a heartbeat visible!  It will ease a lot of my fears I think.

Everyday without spotting, I feel one of two things:

One - relief - another day with no spotting, which means I'm one day closer to 12w

Two - fear - another day with no spotting, COULD mean I'm one day closer to the day that I DO start spotting....

It's a horrible horrible vicious circle - positive, negative, positive, negative...  I wish I could just be 100% positive about the pregnancy, or at least that I could be in denial about the possibility of miscarrying!!!!  I guess this is a scary week for me, because of my spotting starting in the 5th week, in my previous miscarriages.  If I make it to 6w0d with no spotting, I'll feel as if I've overcome some sort of milestone.  I guess no one really knows what is going to happen in the future, and I should enjoy each & everyday that I'm blessed with this baby.......

I forgot about the Pregnancy Calendar on JustMommies - I used it a lot when I was pregnant with Gaby, to check out the little tips, and developmental milestones for each day...  My little tip for today (5w2d) is 'Eating dry crackers may help with morning sickness' - and then it says at 5w5d 'Baby's limb buds are noticeable now' - which makes me smile.. my little one might have 'noticeable' limb buds now!!!!  Little arms & legs!  Cute!