The arrival of Emersyn Lily-May!

ednesday 16th June, at 7am I arrived at the hospital for my elective repeat cesarean. I was taken up to the birthing suite, where they monitored Emersyn's heartbeat for a couple of minutes, and the midwife who was looking after me did some paperwork. I met with the obstetrician who would be performing my cesarean, and soon after that the anaesthetist came in and introduced himself to me. He had to put my IV in, and that was a bit of a mission - he attempted once in my hand and it didn't work - and after he removed the canula (?), I had a big amount of blood come out of my hand, and land all over his pants & the floor. I hoped it wasn't a sign of things to come!

9.30am the obstetrician came and told me it was time! We walked down the corridor, to where the operating theatres were, and it was then that it dawned on me - I was having a baby - VERY soon! My sister was going in with me, and had to wait in the corridor, until they had put my spinal in - I gave her a big hug & in I went. As soon as I was in there, the tears came to my eyes, and I felt very overwhelmed - but in an excited way. The OR staff all introduced themselves, they seemed very relaxed and like nice people, so it helped to keep me somewhat calm.

When they put the spinal in, my midwife held my hands & talked to me - I guess to take my mind of the discomfort of the spinal. It didn't really hurt as such, but it wasn't something I'd want to do everyday! It felt like it took forever to get administered, but it was probably only a couple of minutes. Once it was in the anaesthetist told me I would start feeling warmth in my legs very soon - and almost immediately, on it came. It was such a weird feeling, as the anaesthetic did its job, feeling my legs one moment, and then next knowing they were there, but not being able to feel them.

They got me set up on the operating table, and then my sister came in - and it was time to begin!!!!! I was in a rather happy mood, and laughed with my sister, and my midwife, and chatted with one of the nurses. I could feel pressure on my stomach, and my abdomen moving around, but I had no idea what they were actually doing. It seemed to be taking a long time, and my midwife told me that I had a lot of adhesions in my abdomen, from my first cesarean, so it was taking a bit longer than normal, for them to get to the uterus.

Then the time come - my midwife said to my sister "if you want to take photos of the delivery, you can stand up now and get ready" - as soon as she said that, tears came to my eyes again, I couldn't believe my baby girl was going to be born in the very near future! Again I could feel pulling and tugging, and pressure - but had no real idea what was happening, then my midwife said "here she comes Em" - and the next thing I heard was the cutest little, almost meowing sound, I heard it again, and again - and then I heard an extremely loud, hearty newborn crying.

And the tears started flowing... I was lying on the OR table bawling my eyes out - almost more than Emersyn was!!!!!!! The midwife told my sister she could go over and take photos of them doing the initial post-birth check, and that she could trim the cord if she wanted to, I lay there continuing to cry, so anxious to see my baby, and so relieved she'd arrived. The anaesthetist told me I could move the curtain out of the way a little, and I would be able to see them doing the check. As soon as I did this, and had my first glimpse of my baby girl, a whole new set of tears came.

After her check was done, the midwife brought her over to me, for a kiss, and to have a look... I could barely see her, through the tears - but even with my blurry tear stained vision, I fell immediately in love with this little bundle, who was then being placed in my sisters arms, for a cuddle. Terri sat beside me, holding Emersyn, and I couldn't take my eyes off her... it was then that I noticed that Emersyn had hair!!! Not something most parents would get excited about, but Gaby had no hair until she was 18 months old, so it was quite the novelty for me!!!!

My midwife asked the surgeons if it was okay for me to have skin to skin, and they said it was fine, so my midwife placed Emersyn inside my gown, and I had my first cuddle - and first proper look, at my baby girl. I couldn't stop kissing her soft little cheek, it was an amazing moment... and one that I wish I had been able to have with Gaby, when I had her (the hospital didn't have a skin to skin policy for cesareans, back then).

Around 11.15, I was deemed stable enough to go to recovery. In recovery we continued with the skin to skin, and as the anaesthetic slowly wore off, I was able to take in more of the details of my beautiful daughter.... the fact she had the same lips as her big sister - and the same chubby cheeks.. her tiny little fingers, with the perfect little finger nails, her long eyelashes poking out from underneath her closed eyelids... It really was one of the most blissful, happy, amazing moments of my life.

12.40 we were taken up to the maternity ward - I was a little sad because 1pm-3pm were no visiting hours, so my parents & Gaby weren't able to come up until 3pm. It was lovely seeing Gaby with Emersyn - you could see that she fell in love with her immediately! We were discharged from hospital at midday on Sunday... it was great to finally get home, and to be able to get on with our life as a new little family.

Emersyn Lily-May Oakden
16 June 2010, 10.10am
8lb0oz, 21.7"
little sister to Gabrielle Jayda-Leigh

waiting for it all to begin

seconds old

skin to skin, in recovery

my little family is complete!

the proud big sister, having her first cuddle

asleep on Mummy's bed

ready to go home

Hormones & news stories.. not a good mix

A couple of days ago, there was a fatal car crash, not far from where I live - on a road that I drive down usually at least once a week.  A young man (17) was driving down this particular road - after it had been raining, and he was 'drifting' - showing what a BIG man he was.  Well, this BIG MAN then lost control of his car, went up on the sidewalk - and killed a 4 year old boy and badly injured his 6 year old brother, before smashing through someones fence.  

I heard about the incident on the evening news, and as soon as I had heard it, burst into tears.  What an awful thing to happen to that family - losing one precious little guy, and having another in a serious condition... I kept imagining how it would feel, and all I could do was cling on to Gaby, and thank my lucky stars, that she was there with me - alive...  I also felt immense anger at this BIG MAN - a moments carelessness, stupidity, idiocy - whatever you want to call it, ruined a families life forever - and ended an innocent childs life.

Because the BIG MAN that was driving the car isn't 18, he probably won't even go to jail.  Not for any decent amount of time anyway.  I imagine he will have been strongly effected by the incident, and probably feels awful for what he caused, but at the end of the day, he's going to get a smack on the hand, and probably be allowed behind the wheel of a car again in a couple of years.... for ENDING A LIFE...  It just doesn't make sense.

Earthquakes... getting a little scary

Today we were on tsunami alert AGAIN, due to yet another earthquake, in the Pacific (Vanuatu Earthquake)!  It's getting a bit scary - we had a big earthquake here about 3 or 4 months ago, and then last week Samoa, and now Vanuatu?  One has to wonder if there is going to be *the big one* sometime soon - all this activity, surely it has to indicate that something is going on. The Samoa earthquake hit home (excuse the pun) quite hard for us, because the resort my parents stayed at when they went to celebrate their 25th wedding anniversary (Coconuts Beach Club), was completely destroyed - quite scary to see a place in such destruction on TV, and then to look at photos & see it as it was 2 years ago.

The desire to do a pregnancy test was again strong today - so I did a test, of course it was a BFN.  I later did another two - purely so that I could get those tests out of the way.. I figure if I don't have the tests on hand, then I can't do it.  I have another 2 in my drawer, and am going to try my hardest to not test again for at least another 3 days, but we'll see.  I am not feeling very hopeful about this month, because I'm not really experiencing any symptoms, and have noticed a little spotting...  I'm concerned that my progesterone levels aren't high enough to sustain a pregnancy, so may talk to my doctor about getting some testing done during my cycle, to see what the go is - especially seeing as I have mild PCOS.

Gaby is sound asleep on the couch right now, and I really should wake her up - it's almost 5pm, and if she's asleep much longer, she is going to be awake all night - which I don't want!!