Who said that bribery doesn't work?!

Last year - January-ish, Gaby had her first 'proper' vomit - sadly it happened in her bed, while she was asleep.  After that one incident, Gaby became VERY anti-her-bed, and most nights ended up sleeping with me.  It went on for months - I tried everything I could think of to try to get her back in her bed - changed her room around, got her a cool new bedside lamp, got her new sheets, got her a new duvet, took the bed off its legs so she was on the base - on the floor.. It never worked though.  Most nights I would fight a losing battle, then give in & let her get in my bed.

Around August she FINALLY started sleeping in her bed again - it was great, but then in October she got sick - and spent a couple of nights in my bed with me (at that time Jason was living with us), and after that, she became a frequent visitor in my bed - and slowly got back into her old ways - of not wanting to sleep in her bed.  It was hard for me, because obviously Jason was here - and we wanted time to ourselves in bed, but at the same time - my daughter was feeling upset, my daughter obviously needed that extra security, that being near me at night, brought to her...  A few nights Jason would get home from work & Gaby would be in our bed with me, and by then I was in the 1st trimester and exhausted by 4pm, I never had the energy to get up & move her - especially when I knew it would be a fight to get her to stay in her bed....  That was part of what ended up breaking us up - he thought I was indulging her, that I let her away with too much - that she should sleep in her own bed.. I understood what he was saying - but I also knew that Gaby NEEDED me, and that I wanted her to feel secure... so I couldn't win either way.  

After we broke up & he moved out, I decided that it wasn't worth all the stress & anxiety - on BOTH of us, to get her sleeping back in her bed again, so since then she has been sleeping with me everynight - I didn't have any problems with it, infact it was nice to be so close to her, and to wake up to her every morning.  BUT I did know that the time would come when she'd have to get back in her bed - and I knew it had to be before the baby arrived....  I have been telling her for the past few weeks, that she will need to sleep in her bed eventually - and then yesterday I decided that it was time....

I told Gaby that she'd be sleeping in her bed that night, and she didn't argue - we went and tidied her room, I made her bed up with new sheets & put a new duvet on - let her put all her soft toys on the bed, and basically did what I could to make her feel comfortable with being back in *her* bed.  Admittedly I also used a bit of bribery.  She has been asking me for awhile now, for some Dora socks - but I'd said no, because they seem rediculously priced, compared to the non-label socks I could get her... but I told her if she slept in her bed last night & tonight, that I'll buy her some Dora socks.  Seemed to do the trick too!

Bedtime rolled around,  I took her to her room & she got in bed - she was a bit tearful, but I stood my ground.  I indulged her in her few minutes of stalling tactics - getting her a drink, getting her a toy from the lounge, putting a new blanket on top of her, etc etc, but then told her it was time for bed & that she had to get under the covers.  She started crying & asked if I could stay with her, so I told her of course I would - but she had to snuggle down & close her eyes and go to sleep.. I thought that would cause mass protest - but it didn't!!!

She did JUST AS I ASKED!  She got under the sheets, snuggled down - closed her eyes - and within about 5 minutes, was sound asleep!!!  I was shocked - I really had expected more of a fight than that.  I stayed on her bed for about 10 minutes after she went to sleep, to make sure that she was properly asleep.. then I snuck out to the lounge - and didn't hear her again until about 5-6am this morning, when she hopped in bed with me!!!!!

I was so proud of her, and told her so - and of course she asked about the socks... so I told her if she sleeps in her bed again tonight (like our agreement was), that we'd go buy her socks, after we do the groceries tomorrow morning!  Fingers crossed (very tightly) that she sleeps in her bed again tonight - I think if we can get a few nights in a row, she's more likely to stay there...  

It's a good day in Mummy-land!

Late nights = bad idea & 'the whole sleep thing'

We picked my sister up on Thursday, from the airport - she had been in Thailand for the best part of a month, so it was all very exciting, only 'bad' thing was that Gaby had 2 late nights in a row, which inevitably led to a grumpy-over-tired-Gaby!  She was getting so hyped up during the day, that at night she would 'crash', and be a grizzling, screaming, sensitive shell of herself, and of course grumpy Gaby, meant grumpy Mummy - which wasn't fun for ANYONE.  I think the worst part was that even if she went to bed 3 hours past her normal bedtime - she'd still wake up at her NORMAL wake time, so was only getting by on about 8 hours of sleep.

Yesterday she decided a nap would be a good idea - and fell asleep on the couch.  Because I knew how over tired she was, I figured that it'd be okay if she slept...  Was I wrong!  She woke up and then proceeded to be awake until 10pm!  Ugh!  She ended up sleeping in my bed with me, and I'm not sure what time she got up this morning, but I woke up at 7.30am & she was out in the lounge....

I forget how important her bedtime routine is - no matter what else is going on.  If that routine is messed with, then Gaby gets messed up, and then I get messed up - and it usually takes a few days to get back onto an even keel.  She is at her father's today, and is back at 6pm - I am going to make sure she is in bed by 7pm... she has Kindy tomorrow, so no doubt she will be exhausted tomorrow night - and I'd prefer her to be exhausted after a *decent* 'routine' sleep, tonight.....

It's suddenly dawning on me, that I'm going to have to go through this 'whole sleep thing' again, with our baby bean!  When he/s he arrives I'm going to have broken sleep for months, and then the battle to get him/her to go to sleep willingly, rather than fighting it.  I think the most tiring part of parenting IS the 'whole sleep thing' - which is ironic really!  Gaby was a good sleeper, until early this year - when she vomitted in her bed & then didn't want to sleep in her bed for the next 7 months!  It was 7 months of her crying at bedtime, and ME crying at bedtime - and then usually giving in, and letting her sleep with me, because it was the only way she would go to sleep. 

One thing I DID do with Gab, that I will do again, is get baby bean into a bedtime routine, right from day one.  From the day Gaby got home from the hospital, I would give her a bath, we would have quiet cuddles & then I would put her to bed.... and it was like she instantly realised that this time sleep was for more than an hour or two.  She wasn't very old when I noticed that when I would get her ready for her bath, her little mood would change & she would start being quiet, and more relaxed - it was then that I realised bedtime routines are a great tool.  I might not have been able to follow through on any routine, but her bedtime one, for the most part - was extremely successful.